I’ve been searching for something. Something that would make things click into place, that would bring me that elusive feeling of alignment and purpose, transcending the apparent fragmentation and division I experience balancing family life and a job. Although it’s not that simple, this is more than just “work-life balance”. I also feel the pull of technology as an escape and the disappointment in not knowing my neighbors. The first is common to us all, and the second seems totally within my power to accomplish. I know I experience so much that is common to other middle class, gen x/millennial-ish moms who juggle kids and house and may or may not work on top of it. I also need to lose the baby weight, still, one last time – also in my power to accomplish. It’s so much harder this time but I know I can do it, I’ve done it before.
Anyway, getting to the point, I had a revelation last year, as I contemplated a domain and then a tagline for my blog. I was thinking about what my fellow moms needed, what I needed. Energy. We all seemed to need energy. But then I thought why? Energy for what? In order to seek that which we valued. And so I really thought about what I wanted. After 8 years of giving birth, nursing and raising 4 boys, while keeping up the house and filling all the other hours with a part-time job — I wanted to feel alive. What’s a good word for that? Vibrant, yes that sounds inspiring. And I’d love to feel beautiful, again. And fulfilled. Thus at the top of this page you see the text: Energy for Moms, you can be vibrant, fulfilled, beautiful.
This was such an interesting statement to make, such a risky promise. I did not feel any of those things, so how could I promise you that you could? Because I knew in my soul that there must be a way, there must be more than the tedious routine so many of us have accepted. Months later, I’m still struggling toward seeing results in my life, and yet I know in my heart I’ve been building a foundation for it.
After taking a break from the blog, spending time with family, and then consuming tons of books and inspiring YouTube videos, I’m ready to write again. My biggest challenge is my many interests, which unfortunately translates into a lack of focus. In order to provide value to you and to me, I need to go deep.
I’ve played with new taglines and new websites, mostly landing on aliciaeichmann.com and then considering phrases such as Using Technology to Thrive, and Motivation and Strategy for Work at Home Moms. I even began a series of YouTube videos, playing with the medium and the idea of book reviews and screenshare tutorials of useful websites and apps.
This is such a challenge because my one constant seems to be change. Framed in a positive way, I love to learn. I also love to teach what I learn if anyone is nearby who cares. But I love to learn, and when I don’t have space in my life to accumulate interests I trade one for another. And thus my husband thinks that I never, in a sense, stick with anything and finish it. Which is unfortunately, in a sense, true.
So how can I overcome my natural tendencies and create something consistent and of long term value for you, knowing that I have something I’m meant to share?
My newest inspiration is Leadership — one of my passions that seems most incongruent with my current hermit-like lifestyle, as I work from home and watch my preschooler and toddler. And yet I suspect that this captures the essence of both my internal conflict, and my search for a common, consistent theme.
Motherhood as Leadership.
What does that mean? I wish I had a beautifully insightful summary to insert for you here, but I don’t, just a promise that as I work this idea out I will share it with you here. And the thought that if energy, vibrancy, beauty and fulfillment is the goal and the why of the journey, then perhaps leadership – in the way I will unpack and apply it – is the how.
I do feel in my gut that this is the angle I can take on every topic that I’m focusing on somewhere in my world, from weight loss and parenting, to marketing, time management and the book I just read.
So here we go, welcome to the journey – again.
This post originally appeared on energyformoms.com.